Tryin' To Reason With Hurricane Season

2000-12-31T16:22:00.000-06:00

Okay, it's New Year's Eve, and we all know what that means!!! It's a time for reflection on the year past, a
time to re-evaluate our goals, set new ones, and make resolutions for the coming twelve months...

Unless you're me, that is!!!!!!

I've picked up two extra packs of smokes, the truck from the Beer Store has dropped off the kegs, I've got a
line-up of bottles that the Liquor Store would envy, and my "Thank-You For Your Continued Patronage, Not To
Mention Keeping Us In Business" certificates from both places are proudly framed and sitting where everyone
can see them!!! The freezer has been cleaned out (who needs food, anyway?), all the ice trays are full to
capacity (138 of 'em, reading and waiting), the fish have been taken out of the tank (so we can do Monster
Martinis and Funky Cold Medinas later) and safely stored in the kitchen sink. I was going to put them in the
bathtub, but after last year's impromptu Hottub party ( 3 guys and 4 women with straws and a gutload of
beans), I didn't think I could risk it!!!!! The blender was the other option, but that just seems way too obvious
as an accident waiting to happen!! And hey, who says we don't learn from past mistakes?!

There's a wheelbarrow full of Doritos, a roast pan (I knew that I had one!! Would have come in handy on
Christmas) full of dip, and Pizza Hut is on the speed dial on the phone. They've already been warned ahead
of time, so there should be no problem there. We don't need a repeat of last year's little fiasco, when we all
had the munchies so bad we broke into our local grocery store at 2:00 a.m. and stuffed ourselves with olives,
ripe camembert cheese, peanuts and artichokes!! It was quite the sight the next morning (or so the police
told us), 47 people, passed out in their underwear, laying in Aisle 3, bloated beyond recognition and covered
with ketchup and mustard after an inspired food fight!!!! Ah, good times!!!!

Anyway, we're all set, so I guess I should hit the phone, get yammering and inviting (free booze ALWAYS
brings them running!), and maybe find a clock that works. We really should know the exact time to do the
annual mooning of Dick Clark, see if it helps him to catch up with his age.

Happy New Year everyone, and I'll give you a damage report tomorrow, pending a possible bail hearing!!

2000-12-28T22:16:00.000-06:00

I hope that everyone had a very merry Christmas and managed to stay away from the feast tables long
enough to open their presents!! I'm thinking that Santa was good to everyone, and I hope that I'm right in
believing that. It was a quiet one here at the Ranch, with lots of food, gifts, family and friends. Oh, and a
little bit of booze (quite naturally!). What's a bachelor Christmas without all of those wonderful things?!

We tried something a little different this year. Instead of going down to KFC, buying a bucket, stripping
off the skin and re-assembling the chicken to resemble a turkey, we tried cooking for a change. I mean, we
actually went out, bought one of those frozen footballs that said "Butterball" on it, and chucked it in the oven
for a couple of hours. I never realized that if you do things like that, that you have to read the instructions on
the labels. Apparently there's stuff inside that you're supposed to take out before you throw the frozen carcass
in the heater, and you're supposed to put it in a "roast pan", whatever the hell that is!! Anyway, we didn't.
We stripped off the outer layer of plastic (gonna use it as a rain tarp in the summer), found a pie plate, set
the gobbler on it, turned up the heat as high as it would go and just shoved it in. We were pretty ticked that
it didn't fit in the microwave, but we thought we could figure this thing out as we went. So, if 350 degrees for
for six hours is good, then 500 degrees for four hours should work, right? Anyhow, we did all that, and then
decided that we should watch re-runs of "Gilligan's Island" and drink a case of beer. Well, I'll tell you, midway
through the sixteenth episode, during a heated "who's hotter, Mary-Ann or Ginger" debate (personally, I think
Mary-Ann gets it, hands down), it occurred to us that we should check on our festive creation. Besides, we
were out of beer and somebody had to go to the kitchen and grab the jug of whiskey. Anyway, I got up out of
my chair to go do these things, took one step out of the living room, when all of a sudden there was this god-
awful explosion!! Initially we thought that someone had been trying to clean the toilets with cherry bombs
again, but upon closer inspection they turned out to be okay. It was then that it occurred to us, in our ever
so slightly inebriated state, to check the kitchen. Oh, the humanity!!!!! The door had blown off of the oven,
the entire inside of it was caked with bird, not to mention the walls and floor, and the dog had run off to the
local SPCA to report us for cruelty. So we stood there in the middle of all of that, scrutinizing the situation,
then decided that we could do only one thing. We grabbed that bottle of whiskey, a can of mix, and retreated
to watch the rest of "Gilligan". Hey, from long practice we've learned that if you're drunk enough, you can eat
anything.

We were, and we did. Urp!! Next time we'll stick with weiners and beans.

2000-12-24T21:03:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry I've been away, but my poor little 'pooter died, and it's just today
returned to the land of the living!! I want you to know that I've missed you all, and that I hope you all have a
wonderful day tomorrow!!! Special greetings to Michelle, Tracey, Pidge, Tami, Animal, Scarecrow, The King,
Deb and all those who have made my life so wonderful without knowing it!! I hope that it's a day that you all
remember fondly!!

Oh, and Happy Birthday Jimmy Buffett!!!! The Brother and I will be raising a toast to you tomorrow as we
listen to your songs and have our Island Breakfast. Tomorrow's menu includes cocoanut shrimp, pineapple,
mangoes, grapes, bananas, melon, specialty coffees (mmmmmm), and of course, our ritual of watching
"Club Paradise" . I just love Christmas!!!!!!!!!

My best to all of you, and I'll be sure to write more soon now that I'm back!!!!!

2000-12-10T09:09:00.000-06:00

Sunday again!!!! Yahooooooooooooooo!!!!! And what a beautiful morning it is!!!!!! The sun is shining, the
birdies are chirping, and there's a bachelor breakfast just waiting to be cooked!!! All the Italian Cheese Toast
is gone, but I kept the crusts, just in case they can be used in some diabolical experiment that would stretch
the limits of even my iron-clad constitution!!!! Let's go to the fridge and see what we've got...

Crusts, chip dip, mayo (way past expiry!!) some ham left over from Rememberance Day, limes, a bottle of
Vodka, three pieces of vaguely discoloured, unidentifiable meat products (green is good, right?), a bottle of
water (what? Must be the Brother's), a box of Cow Brand baking soda (hmmm, like as in Scotch and soda?),
a bowl of...of...let me get a stick here (poke, prod)...okay...something, not sure what, and a jar of olives.
Not much to work with, for a typical person, but for a bachelor? A virtual buffet in paradise!!!!!!!!!! Oh, the
glory of it all!!!! If I assemble enough of those crusts, I could make a mayo and olive sandwich!!! Or, I could
take the lime, cut it up (Note: get the knife out of the tool shed, it's in the potting soil bag), dip it in the Baking
Soda and try frying it up along with the ham and the bowl of...whatever, and then garnish is all with chip dip!!
Or I could use the vodka to sterilize the "meat products", kill off anything that might just be stronger than my
stomach, and cook that (Note: DON'T do it!!!! Remember the last time??!!! The hallucinations!? The blue-
fanged Charlie Browns coming out of the wallpaper??!!). Okay, forget that one!!!!!!! Better yet, I think I'll just
skip the solids, go onto the Vodka Martinis, and prepare for this afternoon's soiree across the street.

Always be prepared!!!! Boy Scouts and bachelors...same credo, same purpose!!!

2000-12-09T10:01:00.000-06:00

Alright, more apologies!!! I've been MIA a couple of days, but I'm back!! Sorry about missing those days,
but I'll try and make up for it...

Pidge has been thinking, yet again..."Nacho" is the latest name she submitted in our "Weird and Wild
Nickname Contest". And here's a couple more that need to go with them: Yipper and Seppy, and we
can't forget Fader Jorge (pronounced "fodder hor-gay"), the coffee shop's resident bible-totin' soul saver!!
I'm still waiting for my "Get Out Of Hell Free" card from him, but I don't expect it anytime soon!!! He says
that I actually have to be GOOD to get it!!! This will be harder than I thought!!!!

Well, today it's definitely, officially Christmas for me! Today is the day the tree goes up at the "Sahara
Ranch" and I make my Baileys for Christmas Eve. So the parties officially start this weekend, and go on
pretty well right up until the BIG DAY!! Great, more excuses to be bad!! Just what we needed! So, I'm
really looking forward to getting the tree up, so that I can give Pidge some competition for "purtiest tree
on the planet". It could be tense, and I don't know how we'll compare them, 'cause I don't have a
scanner here, so she'll just have to take my word for it that it's pretty darn good!!!! Judging by everyone
else's blogs, I'm a late starter for the tree thing, but hey, better late than never, right?

Well, that's gonna be it for now. I'm going to go and have some Italian Cheese Toast for breakfast and
then get ready for work. The Brother and his lady just walked in, and I've just received my first smack of
the day, so the day is definitely under way!! I'm off, in more ways than one...!!!!

2000-12-06T18:05:00.000-06:00

Sorry about missing a day guys, but I couldn't play on the 'pooter last night. The Brother (my roomie)
works for the Township, and with the load of snow we got yesterday there was a good chance he would have
gotten called in to plow the roads. I know, I know, why don't I have a separate line for the 'net? 'Cause I'm
cheap, dammit!!!!!!!! And besides, I need to keep the money for other, more important things...like Goslings
Black Rum, cocoanut milk, mangoes, papayas, Kraft Dinner and pineapple juice. Mix 'em all together and
you've got one helluva drink!! (the macaroni makes it chewy!!)

I'd like to say "hi" and "thank-you" to Roy (Animal), Tami (Ola) Roscoe and Lynn/Grace, who've all dropped
by the site to have a look and find out what's going on in this island boy's mind. It was REALLY nice that
Animal and Ola signed the guestbook...right, Roscoe? Don't worry big guy, you'll catch on one day!! LOL

So, as I said, we really got dumped on last night, a good 3 - 5 inches. And cold!!! Damn Pidge, you would
have frozen your little tuckus off up here. But all that's okay, 'cause we're Canadian, and we can handle it!!
(Note to Self: Buy one-way ticket to Carribean, invite friends, have big party, enjoy summer all year!!)

By the way Pidge, Ola says she was having the same problems as you with the "Sailor Moon" dolls, and
her ultimate conclusion was to take duct tape (another fine Canadian invention, just ask Red Green), wrap
it around the doll's leg to attach it to the body, and then proudly announce to her daughter that she now had
a "Barbie with a cast!!" Little Harry (Aaron) bought the idea, and great calm was restored.

Today at the shop I was serving customers "Texas Six-Gun Double-Toilet Chili". What, I hear you ask, in
the hell is THAT? Well, to be truthful, nobody knows, but it looks, smells and even sort of tastes like chili,
so it gets cooked and served. I make it different every time, and there's always at least one new secret
ingredient. Today's "special guest" was Frosted Flakes!! No, really!! It really takes the edge off of the
half-cup of tobasco sauce and the quarter pound of limburger cheese...okay, I COULD be kidding, but you
never know. As soon as any of my customers get out of the hospital, we'll ask 'em. If their tongues have
healed from those second degree burns. Gotta admit though, it was kind of kewl to see smoke actually
pouring out of a person's mouth (that was different!!) Yeah, a little warm and toasty. But hey, it was a cold
day, right?

Maybe next time I'll substitute horseradish for the lemonade, see what happens to the flavour then. I don't
think the citrus pulp mixes properly with the meat, and people are bound to notice.

2000-12-04T15:39:00.000-06:00

So Pidge has finally asked that question that has plagued scholars for the past few centuries: "Why do
all the kewl people live in Canada?" Well, with today's advanced technology, we can now answer that
question by putting it into twelve of our eighteen local Keray Model 10 supercomputers (PS2's with an extra
outlet!) Okay, the question is in, the calculations and configurations are being made, and now, for the first
time ever, HERE is the answer!!!!!!!!!!

2 litres of water
1 tbsp olive oil
250 g of cream cheese
1 cup grated parmesan
500 ml whipping cream
500 g fresh fettucine
250 g of...

Wait a minute!!! What the hell...?? That's my recipe for "seafood fettucine"!! Well, so much for that!!!
Will we ever know the answer? Probably not. But Pidge, here's something to consider. Myself, I think that
when we were all up in Heaven, before we got to come down and start our little go-round on this plane of
existence, I think God asked us where we'd like to live. Those of us who were sitting in the back of the
classroom that day, not paying attention and messing around as usual, got caught off-guard and thought
we were being asked a question on history, something like "In what country did the Winnipeg General
Strike occur?" We all automatically answered "Canada", feeling pretty smart at the time for knowing THAT
relatively boring fact (to this day we're STILL taught in history classes that that was the most exciting thing
that ever happened in our country!) Goes to show you that you should pay attention in class!! So it
basically comes down to the fact that we weren't listening when we were supposed to be, and we've been
trying to make up for it ever since! That's why we gave the world basketball and the telephone, sort of big
apology and all. Next time a question like that comes along we'll be listening closely, and maybe next
time around we won't have to learn to put up with long underwear and reruns of "Gilligan's Island"!!

Speaking of which, did they EVER get off that island?!

2000-12-03T15:13:00.000-06:00

I decided, this being Sunday and all, that maybe I should do some house cleaning. Now as a rule, bachelors
don't do this themselves, because it's considered far too dangerous for them to actually attempt using cleaning
solvents, vacuum cleaners and soap without the proper, adult supervision. But, since there is no one actually
alive willing attempt to clean up after us, at least not without the use of a bio-hazard suit on, sometimes we
have to break down and do it ourselves. I learned a couple of interesting things...

During the summer, when you occasionally pick up a broom or a dustmop to sweep up after you brought
the guys back after a rained-out baseball game or a rousing romp of touch-football in the mud, do you
remember what you did with all the dirt? Apparently, there's something called a "dustpan" that you can
sweep this stuff into, and then dispose of properly. Myself, I don't own one of these things, and the registers
ARE open ducts to somewhere out of sight, so that's where it goes. I made an amazing discovery, though,
when I turned on the furnace the other day...unlike the keys to your car, your membership to the gun club
and that list of important things to do, the dirt doesn't STAY missing when you do that!!!! Suddenly, it's
right there is your face, and on your furniture, and on the drapes, and on...well, everything!!!! I thought that
the furnace sounded kind of funny when I started it the other day, sort of a grinding and groaning from the
nether regions of the house, and then the floors heaved, there was a mighty "WHOOOOMP", like some
primordial belch from hell, and the next thing I knew, I thought it was snowing...inside. Hmmmmmmm.

Oh well, live and learn. Now where's the garden hose? I've got to wash the dishes and the floor at the
same time...hey, saves time!!!! Tide, Pin-Sol, Easy-Off...just what the hell works best on wood floors and
paper plates??

2000-12-03T08:53:00.000-06:00

Hey, TOO KEWL!!!!! Scarecrow dropped by to sign my guestbook!!!! Thanks "J", you're the King!!!!!!
And Pidge (poor, sleepless Pidge, due to constantly thinking of nicknames for my list) has sent me more
names for the list!!! Thank-you!!!!!!!!!

Before we go any further, those in our happy little circle have a beef: we KNOW by our counters that there
are a certain number of people that drop by on a regular basis to read whatever drivel we set down, so WHY
don't you sign our guestbooks?! C'mon, make our days, let us know that we make your days, or you think
we're nuts, or whatever!! K? This was a public service message.

Okay, new names...Pidge, are you sure that you're NOT living in Hillbilly Heaven? LOL Just asking!

SkinnyButt, Gome, Toot-Toot, SugarBooger (Yuck!!! PLEASE!!), SugarTush (that's better), 8-Ball (uh-huh,
wonder how THAT one came to be), ToeNail, ToeFunk, ToeJam (foot fetishes, anyone?), Nostrils, The Dream,
and Ice Cream.

Thanks again, Pidge. Hmmmm, that last one reminds me of this girl that we grew up with, and her nickname
was "Tin Roof". She was going out with my buddy Cookie, and we all went to a hockey tournament together
in Barrie. Anyway, she got THIS nickname from a certain sexual deviancy thing that was attempted, and
then...well, that's another story altogether! I wasn't involved, so I wasn't scarred for life, although if you read
my previous blog, you might wonder about that! LOL

Anyway, Scarecrow has updated his blog, filled us in a little more about himself, and I suggest you check
it out!! I'd have the link pasted here, but I still don't know how to do that, and I feel guilty asking anyone
because 'Racey and Pook have already gone above and beyond in helping me out with this page. So, go
to Pidge's page ("slobbybloggy" in the left column), check up on her, and then go from there. And while
you're at it, check up on the rest of our happy bunch, see what's going on!! It's not a law, but it WILL help
with your peace of mind. Well, for MOST of us!! LOL

Gotta go check the mail....

2000-12-03T08:30:00.000-06:00

Sunday morning, and that means GOOD!!! Even though it means I've got to start my usual work-week
all over again tomorrow, today I have a whole day to figure out what to do. And what could be more
exciting for a bachelor on a Sunday morning than...BREAKFAST!!!!!! Ooooooooh yeah!!!!

Now, I know that some of you don't think that this sounds too exciting, but you have to understand, a
bachelor's breakfast is like NO other!!! We can wander down to the fridge, yawning and stretching, with a
grin on our faces, thinking of the virtual cornucopia of goodies that await us!! Traditional folks this morning
will be sitting down to eggs, bacon, ham, waffles, juice and milk, maybe even a sausage or two. As a
matter of fact, if I was in the Islands right now, I'd be having fresh mango, eggs, and a tall glass of OJ and
and equally big one of milk. But I am here, and that means my choices are different, and therefore more
exciting...

By the way, when I refer to bachelors, that also includes the ladies (bachelorettes). We're all in this
together, and I'm rooting for ya!!!

Let's see, what can we have today? Ooooooh, the choices!!!!!!! Choice number one is Egg-Foo Breakfast
(left-over Chinese food), number two is Italian Cheese Toast (leftover pizza), and number three is Death Over
Easy (leftover leftovers!!!). Be still my heart, and be bold my arteries!!!! What's this?!!!! Oh wait, yet
ANOTHER choice!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, happy day!!!!!! Is that something swimming in a bowl of ketchup????!!!!!!!!!!!
YES, YES, YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Heartburn City, here I come!!!!!!!!!!! Now, the next thing to decide is to whether
you just pop it into the microwave for a couple of minutes, just to see if the skin on the top will loosen up,
or should I leave it outside for an hour, unobserved, and then go out and see if there's any dead critters
around it? Decisions, decisions. Too many for a Sunday!!! Let's go for Death Over Easy!!!! It looks
appetizing enough! (Important Note: To qualify for this distinction, the leftover leftovers must be a MINIMUM
one week old, must be ALL mixed together, and you shouldn't be able to remember when exactly you had
the first chance to ingest these tasty treats!) Something else to consider...is there enough Alka-Seltzer in
the house to stave off the possible repercussions of this "meal". Best to check that FIRST!! Alright, we're
all set to go!!!!

To properly prepare this morning repast, certain steps MUST be taken. Steps must be followed as set down
in the Bachelor Handbook, which we all received upon graduation from Bachelor University, where we also
had a minor in "Soap Flakes: Breakfast Cereal or Something Else Entirely?" Junior bachelors in training,
do NOT attempt "Death Over Easy" prior to graduation!!! It can be fatal to those who have not yet taken
"The Iron Gut: Preparation, Care and Maintenance"!!

Step 1: Find a pot or pan. It may be in the oven, or under the fridge catching drippings, or on the living room
sofa, filled with gear oil to clean that carbeurator. Retrieve it, empty it out as much as possible, but
DO NOT wash it, and put it on the top of the stove. Remove other items from stovetop that may be
flammable, like copies of Maxim, The Wall Street Journal, socks, and last weeks newspaper that
you had the fish wrapped in when the tragic "Trout Almandine" experiment failed.

Step 2: Empty contents of fridge into pot. Maybe add a little water to it, just in case. If your water has been
shut off (it HAPPENS!!), find a half-full beer bottle or that bottle of bourbon that you cleverly hid in
with the cleaning supplies (so THAT'S where it went!!! Never would have thought to look there. What
the hell are these other things? Pledge? Sprrrrrrrt...oooh, it's lemon air freshener!!!!! Too kewl!!)

Step 3: Place pot on top of burner, turn on "high", and go watch "SportsDesk" for an hour. This is
important, because it will take at LEAST long for that gluey, tarry mass to achieve the proper
consistency so that it can slide down your throat without lodging in it. By the way, just because
10W30 is an oil, it does not, repeat DOES NOT, work as a suitable lubricant for food. Not all oils
are created equally. Use 3-In-1 instead.

Step 4: Return to kitchen, turn off heat, turn off smoke alarm, remind yourself to get fire extinguishers
re-filled, and throw pot outside to cool down. Go to pantry, find bottle of Bacon Bits, pour into the
dog's bowl (it's the only one you'll have, and besides, the dog hasn't been eating lately due to the fact
that he was brave enough to attempt wolfing down the tragically aforementioned "Trout Almandine"
experiment), add Alka-Seltzer tablets (two) and Kool-Aid (mix with aquarium water). Enjoy!!!!!!!!

Aaaah, breakfast!!!!!!!!!!!! Truly the most important meal of the day!!!!!!!!!!!

2000-12-02T20:14:00.000-06:00

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!! Smiles, everyone, smiles!!!! How's everyone's day been? Good? Good.

Pidge was back to me with yet MORE nicknames; I'm beginning to think that her part of the world is a
lot like mine, complete with rednecks and hillbillies!! LOL I submit the newest list, and you can decide
from there:

CJ, Kitten, Little Joe (I'll see you back at the Ponderosa, Pa!), Precious, Tay Tay, BabyDoll, Troll,
GoatBoy (PLEASE, spare us the details on THAT one!!), Nub, Tee (golf instructor?), Logey, Bear,
Morgie Borgie, Big Ma, Biggun', Littlun', Oohma, DirtDobber, Stinkah Britch, Seven, Pops (a little girl
that lives down the street from her), and the ever-popular Pinky!!!

Looking back, this list is pretty impressive! Thanks to everyone for all their help on this. I still haven't
heard what would be a suitable prize for the winner, but I'm sure that we'll get to that!!! It can't be a
million dollars, of course, especially if Pidge is the winner, 'cause that'd be, oh, about a billion and a half
Canadian, I think!!! We'd have to borrow the money from lower Mongolia!!!

Speaking of a billion dollars, here's something that irks me!!! This is how forgiving we Canadians are, and
it's something that I just can't understand!!! Earlier this year, one of our members of parliament, Jane Stewart,
who was in charge of Job Development and Human Resources, had this great idea to help out new businesses
and such with loans to get started. Well, she and her happy dwarves gave out the money left, right and
centre, but didn't bother to CHECK to see where the money was going or if it was even being paid back!!!!!!!
The next thing you know, there's a BILLION dollars Canadian missing and unnaccounted for!!!!! (That's about
ten dollars US) So, she gets dismissed and has to find something else to do for awhile. Get this; two weeks
ago we had our federal election, and she gets voted back in!!!!!! She's in the riding just south of this county
where I live, and I seriously think that there's something in the water down that way, 'cause these people
just aren't right in the head!!!!!!!!!! When she lost the money, our "beloved" Prime Minister, Jean Chretien,
called it a "billion dollar boondoggle" (his actual words!!!! "Boondoggle" is French for "I don' know what dat
dere is in de English dere). Unbelievable!!!!!!!!!!!

With common sense like that, maybe I CAN get elected Supreme Ruler of the Free World, even with a
nickname like "Poonum Bear"!! LOL

2000-12-02T14:46:00.000-06:00

Today has been one of those days that I look forward to so much. It's all been incredibly good, and
now I'm just sitting back and revelling in it. There's a pile of paperwork on the table that I know won't
get done, I had to explain to one of my employees about what it is I need for her to do to keep my
business running smoothly (yet again), I still haven't learned to play the piano and there's seven new
books (oops, eight) that I haven't started reading yet, though I know that I eventually will. But that's
all by the wayside, 'cause like I said, it's been an incredibly good day!!

I got to spend time doing the things that I love the most, seeing people and going to places that create
special memories, and now I'm just kicking back, having a smoke, listening to Jimmy Buffett tell about
life in the islands, and going back over the happenings of the day. Isn't life wonderful when you get to do
the things you really look forward too? I recently explained to someone very close to me that "it's the
little things that make life so good". It doesn't have to be something huge and monumental, it just has
to be something that's done with love. Too many times we think that we have to prove ourselves to those
we love by doing something incredible, something thoughtful and that has great meaning. And while that
is wonderful, it's still the little things that mean so much. A phonecall, a letter, a smile. Something that
says "I'm thinking of you". What could be better? The next time those who are close to you do something
like that, be sure to thank them for it. They may say no thanks are needed, but everyone needs to know
that you appreciate their efforts, no matter how trivial it may seem to them. In the long run, the little things
eventually gel into one big thing, a beautiful collage of memories to last a lifetime.

Thank-you!!

2000-12-02T11:05:00.000-06:00

Other things that make you think...

Okay, so I've got the stereo going as I write, and I hear the CrimeStoppers blurb come on, yapping about
their "Crime of the Week". So it made me wonder, how would it feel if you were the person responsible for
the crime? Would you be excited that you made it on the radio? Would you call your buddies and tell them
that you're famous now, and you can move onto bigger and better stuff? Would you disdain the usual, run
of the mill B & E and turn to carjackings? This would be interesting to know. I wonder, if the criminal
organizations in this country had an awards show, would it be based on the number of times you made
"Crime Of The Week" on radio, TV or in the newspapers? Or would they base it on flashiness? Maybe
it'd be like the Academy Awards, and they'd have a whole list of sub-categories; fastest timing, cleanest
getaway, slickest duplicity, disguises, attitude during crime commision, and maybe a special category
for fastest hands in the 3 card Monte demonstration.

Where's my voting card? I want to nominate the Queen for her neck-wringing episode with the pheasant
a week ago!! I'll mark it under "necessary but misunderstood". If the Queen actually wins the award, I
wonder if she'd bring the carcass? I guess it would be alright if she used the feathers to make herself a
new hunting hat, she could bring that instead.

Alright, this is getting weird, so I'd better go...

2000-12-02T10:54:00.000-06:00

Alright!!!!!!!!!!! More names to add: Farhonalarue, Scrubby, Chubrina Ballerina, Three Bums, Bicky Baby,
Shell the Belle, Monkey, Motormouth, Thunderlips, Mao, Cabbage Patch and Chicklet.

The ol' list is starting to grow. It's funny when you look at the names that have been put down, and you
think of the people that go with them. I know what it's like to have one of those names, and how it came to
be, and it's weird how you can have an affection for them after awhile, like it's your personal property. Have
you ever run into anybody with the same nickname as you? Kinda strange how you'd react to someone
having the same moniker as you. It's not like the first name is the same, but the special name is. That's
sort of like a territorial thing. Hmmmm, something to think about!

2000-12-02T06:20:00.000-06:00

Hmmmm, I was beginning to think that this nickname thing was going to go nowhere, but I just happened
to be on my routine blog-tour this morning and I saw that Pidge had come up with a bunch for me!!!
Thanks kiddo!!!!

Spot, Flea, Boogy, Muzzie, HoneyDew, "P", "B" (a cat), Slam, The Lamb, Harry, Ben, Big Ben, Benny,
Bronson (the previous five were her father), Mary Todd, Nuisance (not too tough to figure out!), Peanut (1,2,3),
NayNay, Bubba, Goobey (goobey?!), FrenchMa, Ophy, Pieface (hmmmm), Cap'n, and last, but definitely
not least in this little list, Coconut Harley. Check out slobbybloggy to find out the origin of that one!!!

Thanks Pidge, and thanks again to Michelle and Tracey for their contributions.

But I need more!!!!!!! We should make this a contest, and the winner gets, ummmmmmmm, well, I don't
know, but I'll take suggestions on that too!! Lemme hear from ya!!!

2000-11-30T14:15:00.000-06:00

I was thinking back to what I wrote about having a song for Michelle. Actually, I DO have one, and
I've written out the words here so you can understand how I feel for her. It's not so much about the
time mentioned in it, but more of the feelings brought out in me by her. This is a version that was
done by The Beachcombers, a band that plays at Ocean Annie's in Myrtle Beach.

"Too Good To Be True"

It's getting late and the day's at it's end
My favourite time of night is right around the bend
It's when the time comes to turn the lights down low

She pours the wine, and I'll lock the door
She takes my hand like so many nights before
That's when I know Heaven's waiting for me

She's too good to be true, she blows my mind
She's still the one who thrills me time after time
It's unbelievable, the way she moves me
She's so easy to love, so tender to hold
She touches me like no one I've ever known
The way she moves me
She's too good to be true

The radio plays a melody
One designed especially for her and me
An old love song, that we used to slow dance to
And when she says how happy she's been
An old familiar feeling comes over me again
I count my blessings, how lucky I am

She's too good to be true, she blows my mind
She's still the one who thrills me time after time
It's unbelievable, the way she moves me
She's so easy to love, so tender to hold
She touches me like no one I've ever known
The way she moves me
She's too good to be true

The way she moves me
She's too good to be true...

And that's just the way it is. The best part about all of that is that she doesn't even have
to try to make these feelings come out in me. They are always there, in my heart and in my
mind, and that is something that is irreplaceable!! To feel that way for someone so naturally,
to love them for who they are and not who you perceive them to be, that's what love truly is.
She ISN'T too good to be true; she's a wonderful, loving woman, a beautiful mother and a
person that you count yourself lucky to know. She's just as human as the rest of us, and
she has the same feelings, the same doubts, and the same anxieties as the rest of us,
and that just makes her more endearing when she's willing to confront them and try to solve
them, not run away and hope everything will get better on its own. She's strong, stronger
than she knows, and even when things look their bleakest, she knows that she has people
who love her and will be there for her, no matter what. She is Michelle, the centre of my
universe.

She's unbelievable.

But NOT too good to be true!!!!!

2000-11-30T13:49:00.000-06:00

You gotta love people that are remembering the things that you forget!! Kind of like having a personal
overseer/reminder!!! Thanks to Flutterbymee, we can add "Chernobyl Bob" to the list. And so, in doing
that, we also have Flutter's nickname, which is "Racey" or "Hot L'il Momma", definitely not last OR
least!! Thanks Racey, and thanks Michelle for making me admit to "Poonum Bear" in public!! LOL

If anyone reading this stuff that I write has any additions, please feel free to e-mail them to me!!
Let's see who has the weirdest and wildest one's out there, but they have to be REAL nicknames,
nothing made up on the spur of the moment!!!!!!

2000-11-30T12:34:00.000-06:00

Here's a couple more of those nicknames that I was trying to remember that didn't occur to me until
the customers started rolling in this morning: Rooster, Roscoe, Weiner, Rusty, Kev-Chop, Mo, Heat
(aka The Blanket), Kingpin and Puddles The Birthday Clown (how the hell could I have forgotten THAT
one??!!)

Also, Michelle pointed out to me that I had forgotten two very important ones; the ones that we have for
each other. The reason that I didn't mention them was because the one I have for her is a private pet-name,
but you should all know that it is "Pook". The other one that I didn't mention is the one that she has for me,
and the reason for that is...well....c'mon, "Poonum Bear"? Alright, yes, it IS cute, but how will I ever get
elected as leader of the free world if THAT one was widely known?! LOL Gotta love her!!! And no, honey,
they weren't mentioned because you WEREN'T on my mind...you're ALWAYS on my mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey,
I just got an idea for a song that...no, wait, Willie Nelson did that one already. ~SIGH~ Back to the 'ol
drawing board for that.

2000-11-29T18:36:00.000-06:00

What's In A Name?

Do you ever wonder how people get nicknames? I mean, what's the history behind them? Is it a short-
form of a last name? or was it something that was done to earn them this distinction? The reason that
I'm wondering this is because I watch my customers come and go each day, spending their little bit of
time with me, and they all seem to have a name that they are more familiarly known by than their given
names. For instance, and these ARE actual nicknames of people I know:

Animal, The Kid, Nupper, Bunches, Soupy, Duck, Mouth, Dinker, Schlutz, Bo, Strick, Crapper, Coon,
Bunny, Sister Theresa, Ola, Plucker, Rambo, Bubba, Junior, Eric The Awful, Teedah, Ripper, Ace,
Bubbles, Raaaaaalf, Hustler, Fingers, JamTart, Kirby, Gunner, Boy...and the list goes on. I included a
couple of my nicknames in there, although I'm sure as hell not going to tell anyone what they are!!!!!!
Some of them date from childhood, and I have NO idea how they got there!! LOL

Okay, some of them are obvious shortforms of last names, but where the hell did "Duck" come from?
I know how "Crapper" got his name (able to perform an audible function on command), and "Soupy" (late
night yak-attack at a party), but then there's "Dinker" (actually, if you met the guy, you'd figure it out
pretty quickly! Update: His nickname was just changed to "Tumour" this week, something to do with
moving big rigs around in the yard and hitting other parked vehicles...) Yup, makes you wonder. How
about Tuna? Mouse? Nee-Nee? Nickers? Bessie? Stoner? Cornhole? Drano? Cookie? Hobs?
Old Meat? Brick? Wee Willie? All real nicknames, all real people, and all from one small town.
There's more, I just can't think of them at the moment, and they're all customers of mine...

It's hard sometimes to remember their real names, you become so familiar with the names you hear
every day, and you can imagine the confusion if a wedding invitation ever goes out!! A recent example:

Don and Alma are pleased to announce
the wedding of their son
Donald Keith
To
Jennifer Elizabeth
Daughter of Julie and Don

Huh? Oh wait, that's the wedding of Ace and the Bunster!!! It's no wonder there's so much booze
consumed at weddings in a small town!!

Just something that was on my mind, for no particular reason.

2000-11-26T00:10:00.000-06:00

For Pidge...

Cheer up kiddo!!! I know that things are tough right now, but believe me, if we could do it for you, the
bunch of us that love you so would be down there in a second, helping to clean the house and do the
babysitting!! The tree will get put up, and the decorations added, and you'll have a great Christmas!!
If you need more than that, think of the fact that we've got snow all over the ground up here, we're
freezing our little butts off, and the only ocean close to us (the pond downtown) has a layer of ice on
it!!!! Not a damn palm tree in sight!!! Brrrrrrr!!!!!

If you guys need a good chuckle, check out this hilarious lady at my link "slobbybloggy". She always
guarantees a smile!!!!

2000-11-26T00:01:00.000-06:00

Bring Back The Magic...

Well, it is now official, the magic has once again returned. The magic that I'm referring to is that of the
Christmas season, which is now well and truly underway. Ahhh, you have to love this time of year, despite
the commercialism that has changed the true meaning of it. It really got underway for me last night, when
I helped out our local Kinsmen Club with getting Santa's float ready for today's parade, but it is the parade
itself that I want to talk about...

You can feel it in the air the day of the Santa Claus parade, how people's moods change and the
atmosphere takes on that special feeling. Our parade always begins at 1:00, and it's not usually a big
affair; a couple of floats, maybe a local celebrity, and of course, Santa himself. I went down to my shop
to help out with the pre-parade rush about a half hour before it all began, and basically just threw myself
into it. It's always a nuthouse for this day, and it feels good to know that even though the weather outside
is cold (and it was), you've provided something to help the people keep warm. Well, it wasn't long before
I heard the first sirens blaring from the police car and fire truck leading the parade, and I grabbed my
jacket and headed outside. The parade always passes right in front of my shop, and even though I could
sit in the chairs by my big front window and watch it, I prefer to be outside so that I can actually get a good
feel for what's happening. My purpose on this day is two-fold; I'm there to help my employees when the
going gets a little wild, and I also judge the floats. I've been judging for the last 5 years, and it's always a
lot of fun, especially as we make sure that the kids that have done the so much work on their floats win!!
There's no slight against the bigger companies that put their floats in, but hey, Christmas is for kids, right?

Anyway, I was standing out there, pen and pad of paper in hand, ready to do my marking, and I took a
really good look around at the crowd. Our town has grown so much in the past ten years, and there's so
many people that I didn't recognize, but at the same time, the same old feeling was there. It seems like
there's nothing like a small town parade, it has a special feel to it, a certain something that the cities
don't have. I guess it's because it's more personal. You know the people on the floats, they know you,
and you're all sharing something special. As I said, I took a good look around, and even though there were
so many people I didn't know, they all had that look on their faces, especially the kids, the look that says
"Santa is coming, and that means Christmas will soon be here!" I couldn't help but smile, and when our
local band came marching down the street, you couldn't help but be swept up in it. A word about the
band I just mentioned; they're a special breed, sort of like rednecks in clown suits!! Something about them
just ain't right, and if you've ever heard them play, you know exactly what that "something" is!!

Well, that ol' parade just kept on coming, float after float and group after group of people!!! I've never seen
it so big, and for once I really had to think about who I would choose to win this year. The crowd was
packed three and four deep in some places, and the kids were grabbing all the candy that they could as it
was thrown out to them by the participants. It was a regular free-for-all, and it was a good time. Everyone
was excited, and when Santa arrived, the kids went ballistic. "Santa" in this case is a good friend of mine
named Tim, and he plays the role incredibly well. Good job, buddy!! The parade proceeded up to the Kin
hall, and there he greeted all the kids that stood in line, and they each got a chance to sit on his lap, tell
them what they wanted on the big day, and then they each received a bag of candy. Gotta love it!!!!

It's days like this when you can't help but love the rest of the world. I made my votes, collected the ones
from the other judges, and then just kicked back and watched the festivities. People were laughing and
smiling, wishing each other "Merry Christmas", even though it's a month away, and just having a blast
being out in the fresh air with their kids. It's made even more special when you think back to the times
that you were a kid, and you were the one standing there waiting for Santa, and now you're running into
people that you grew up with and they've brought their kids to see the big guy. A tradition is carried on,
and it's one that you're glad to be a part of. It's truly the start of bringing back the magic!

2000-11-22T15:33:00.000-06:00

Missing The Beach

It's times like this that I really miss the beach and the ocean. Outside my window, winter's first snows
are blowing, and an icy chill fills the air, one that permeates this misplaced island boy to the bones. Don't
get me wrong, I love this time of year, as I have said previously, but once the cold settles in, it makes me
long for far away places.

My love for the islands and the ocean goes back a long way, to the first time I stepped off of the airplane
in Montego Bay, Jamaica. That was twenty years ago now, but I can still put myself there even now. I
can still see myself standing at the top of those runway steps, holding my parka in my arms, and inhaling
that fresh salt air, lightly blended with the smell of hibiscus. The sun was beating down on my face, and
the 80 degree temperature felt like Heaven compared to the -25 we had left behind in Canada. I was in love
from that moment, and I remember turning to my mother and saying, "I could LIVE here!" But, that didn't
compare to the moment we got to our hotel and I saw the ocean for the first time. I couldn't take my eyes
off of it; the hypnotic way the waves rolled in, and the way the palm trees seemed to sway in synch with
the breaking water. I truly had found my place.

Jimmy Buffett, the man who has helped to influence my love of the sea and all that life has in it, wrote a
song called "A Pirate Looks At Forty", a song about a friend of his who had finally found his lot in life.
But it is the opening of that song, the first few bars and then the following lines, that sum it up best for
me:

Mother, mother ocean
I have heard you call
Wanted to sail upon your waters
Since I was three feet tall
You've seen it all
You've seen it all

The song holds me in rapture everytime I hear it, and it is a definitve song for me. It has the power and
the magic within it to take me to the places where I long to be, the places that have meant so much. Over
the years, I have spent a lot of time in the Caribbean, mostly in Bermuda, and it never fails to appeal to
the pirate in my soul. Oh, how I wish that I could have lived in those days, sailing the high seas, my eyes
always on the horizon, looking for the telltale sign of the mast of a Spanish galleon carrying treasure. I
would have been a gentleman's pirate, willing to take the gold, but always sparing the lives of those
carrying it if they gave it up without a fight. I would allow them the choice of joining my crew or sailing on
their way. Those that joined me would be promised a life of carefree living, fabulous riches, and a love that
that they could find for their own on one of the many islands we visited. I would take them away from the
drudgery of everyday life, the routine living that eventually grinds us all down, and show them a world that
most can only dream of...

But that was then.

Yes, I am a pirate
Two hundred years too late
The cannons don't thunder
There's nothing to plunder
I'm an over forty victim of Fate
Arriving too late
Arriving too late

Luckily, even though I can't live my life on the seas as the men of those times, I have managed to live
in the style that I have dreamed so often of. My attitude is, for the most part, carefree and happy, and I am
more than willing to share that with those that I love. I show them that there is another side to life, one that
can be so much more fulfilling than the one they live now, and it fills me with happiness when they discover
that they can control their destinies. So many have lost that ambition, and so many need to find it again.
There is so much more to life than money; love, personal happiness, self-respect. Where did it all go wrong?
and who took it away from us? In our hearts we know the answer to that, but knowing the answer is only
half of the battle. We have to use that knowledge to build a better lives for ourselves and the ones we love,
to help them see the other side of life, the one that we were truly meant to live.

Yes, I am a pirate, two hundred years too late, but I'm one who sails the oceans of my mind, with my eye
on new horizons. There's a wonderful world out there, just waiting to be discovered, and those who dare to
find it are the ones who will be able to say in the end, "some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a
good life all the way".

The one thing that I've missed about my time in the islands is that I've never had anyone to share my
discoveries with. Now that I have found her, the one who I can truly understand my love of these things,
I can once again venture to these places, show her exactly what it is that makes me love these places
almost as much as I do her. With her by my side, my life is exactly where it should be. I have had the
adventures I promised my crew, sampled the riches we have plundered, and now the love that I promised
we would find in these places is finally mine.

The funny thing is, it was right in my own backyard.

So scan your horizons, trim your sails, take a bearing on the compass of your life, but never lose sight of
your home port completely, because you never know what riches can be found right there.

2000-11-21T20:04:00.000-06:00

WAY TOO KEWL!!!!!!!! Man, I was impressed with just having a new colour scheme going on, and then
I tuned in a little earlier to see if anything had changed, and I found that the most amazing transformation
had taken place!!! Tracey and Michelle have worked wonders, and I think that you'll have to agree with
me on that!!! They are incredible, and unbelievably kewl!!!!!!!!! Gotta love 'em!!

Hey Pidge, thanks for signing the 'ol guestbook, it feels really good to see your words there with
Michelle and Tracey's!! Just makes me feel a part of a wonderful circle of people!!!!

2000-11-20T16:22:00.000-06:00

Ahhhh!!! That's soooo much better, the calming colour that reminds me of the oceans that guide my life. So much better than that drab grey, which reminds me more of the colour of the overcast skies of the winter season. Many thanks toTracey and Michelle, for working the magic that I have so many problems understanding. You two really are the KEWLEST!!!!!!

What is it about the first snowfall of the year that makes things seem magical? Is it the fact that we
know that winter is upon us, a time of Christmas and the knowledge that soon we will be gathering with
our families to celebrate the love and life that we all share? Or is it the fact that the world looks new to
us, so fresh, clean and white? Everything appears virginal, like it all was just created, and it touches
our senses in ways that only poets seem to be able to pinpoint. Scintillatinly clean and bright, and
the cold crispness of the air seems to emphasize it. Myself? I think that it's all of the above, and even
though I, like all the rest of the people that I know, will not see it this way in the months to come, right
now I can appreciate it for what it is and what it brings. I know that soon I will be longing for my islands,
to feel the sand beneath my feet, to taste the salt air, and to feel those tropical breezes blowing through
my hair. I will long to see the sun rise and set above those rolling waves, picture the moon shining down
on the glittering water, and to smell the night scents of jasmine and hibiscus as the creak of bamboo
swaying in the wind lulls me to sleep. But, I am fortunate in that I can keep all these things ever-present
in my mind, and with a true love to go with it all, life is as close to heaven on earth as it can be. Michelle
reminds me of all these things that I love each time I see her. In her eyes I see the depths of the ocean
that guides my life, and in her smile I see the sunrise and sunset that I crave so much. Her touch is
the island breeze, and her scent that of the flowers of my Paradise. Would that I could give her more,
show her more of this world that I so fervently love, the one that she re-creates for me without even
knowing and, better still, without any effort. To hold her under the full moon, dancing in the sand to an
island lullabye, tasting her sweet lips, fragrant as honey blossoms, and then taking her hand and guiding
her into the warm, welcoming waters, what more could one man want? To share these things for Eternity, of course. That and everything else that this life has in store for us. We still have hurricanes to weather, tropical storms to wait out, and days when the Doldrums set in and nary a breeze blows, but in the end we will emerge together, safe and unscathed, and loving each other with a passion that few have felt before in the history of Man. Those days are coming, and I look forward to them like a child at its first
few Christmases; with heady excitement and anticipation, and with the knowledge that it is at this time
that love is felt the most deeply, and the world is serene and contented.

I love her that much, Forever and Beyond Eternity.

2000-11-18T14:32:00.000-06:00

"The Return Of Island Jack"

Hey everyone, I'm back to the land of blog, fresh from yet another trip through my mind that once more
has brought a smile to my face. Michelle is the reason for my smile, of course, and that smile always
begins in my heart and spreads through me with the force of a tropical storm building to hurricane intensity. And, as strong as that smile is, my love for her is even stronger, with a rating previously unknown on the hurricane charting scale. Hurricane Andrew was a 5, and it wiped out a lot of the Florida panhandle. My heart, previously rooted as solidly as Kiliminjaro, has been swept away by Hurricane Michelle. Love that strong and intense is never to be taken lightly, always regarded with awe and admiration. It's hard to believe that a force that powerful can be found in the human heart, and not in nature itself, and yet when it strikes, instead of wreaking havoc and destruction, it builds new hope and gives life and love where it was thought it would never grow again.

Those of you that have been following what's happening through the Blog sites LoveShackBaby and Flutterbymee have a pretty good idea of what's happening. Please bear with me as I now introduce the other view, mine, and let me show you things from my side.

If you have been following, you'll know that I was to meet with Michelle's husband Gord this morning. We
met at my coffee shop, and exchanged views and ideas for two solid hours. I have to tell you, the man is
incredible, and I can see in him what made Michelle fall in love with him. We are so much alike it's scary,
and the similarities are frightening. The biggest one? That he grew up in the same house that my Mother
did!!!!! Now how's that for coincidence?

Basically, our meeting was to get to know each other, understand where the other man was coming from,
and to see where this all was headed with Michelle. We both love her so much, and neither of us is going
to budge an inch on this issue. We both need her in our lives, for without her neither of us is complete.
She is the true North of our compasses, and we know that as long as we follow the heading that leads to
her, we will always find our way home. She is our common ground, our island, and in her harbours we both
feel safe and secure.

We had so much to talk about, and we did, but the one thing that I just couldn't really do is talk to him
about my future with Michelle. How do you look a man in the eye and tell him that you want his wife to be
YOUR wife, that you want to share your life with her, along with all your hopes and dreams? How do you
tell him that no matter how much you like and respect him, that you are willing to do anything to be with
her, no matter what the cost? And that's the hell of it; I really DO like him, I think he's a great person!! But
I don't want to cause him any more pain that what he's already gone through, because that's not something
that I can do willingly. I know what you're thinking; if I really meant that, then none of this would have
happened in the first place. The thing is, it all started perfectly innocently, with Michelle reaching out to
me because she needed someone to talk to, someone to listen to what she had to say, someone with a
fresh and different perspective on life. And I was there. Somewhere along the way, we fell in love, and we
fell hard. Life was changed forever for us, and suddenly something that we had both searched for all of our
lives was right there in front of us, just waiting for us to reach out and grab it, like a lifering in storm-tossed
waters. And, instead of drowning in a meaningless and meandering life, we were both rescued, pulled to
safety by a love stronger than any force created by Man or Nature. The element of danger was still there,
of course, circling and building just offshore, but we had confidence in each other and were willing to risk
it all. Then, like a tropical storm it hit, suddenly and without warning, and we were in a situation that we
had hoped to avoid. Gord discovered our love for each other and told her it had to end. And, to be honest,
she DID try. She tried to put her love for me to the side and to rediscover the love that she had for her
husband. It was a noble effort, one that tore her up on the inside, and one that ultimately failed. Her love
for him was gone, at least the love that he wanted and needed, and she couldn't be for him what he wanted.
Through it all I sat on the shore, watching the storm as it swirled furiously around me, and when she needed
support, I was there for her, to reassure her and tell her that I love her. She has tried so hard, but she can
no longer give what she no longer has.

As I said, while all this was going on, I waited on the shore to see what would happen. I couldn't tell her
how desperately I loved and needed her, because I needed to give her the chance to to try and find those
feelings again that she had lost somewhere along the way. I wanted to reach out and comfort her, to tell
her that I loved her more than life itself, to hold her in my arms as the tempest swept around us, and to
fill her heart with the love that I had for her, to let it join with hers and root us solidly in the face of disaster.
By doing so, by holding back like this, it almost caused her downfall, and for that I am truly sorry. But, just
when the storm was at its peak, the eye of the hurricane was over us, and a for now a calm serenity is
over us. The eye will pass over us, of course, and there are more storms to weather, but we are now firmly
rooted, and nothing can take away this love we have for each other.

Remember the old adage? The one that says "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you,
it is yours. If not, it never was." This is one of the most perfect examples of that being true. I set Michelle
free to decide her course, and she took to wing to try and find her true heart. She has returned to me, like
the sunrise the morning after. Thank God.

I'm sorry for the hurt that I have caused in this life, and I apologize to all those whom it has affected. And
I sincerely apologize to Gord for the hurt that I have caused him, but this is something that cannot be
avoided this time. I love her with all my heart, and to deny myself those feelings and that happiness is to
kill all that is me and all that I am. And I can't let that happen. Ever.

2000-11-01T14:42:00.000-06:00

A friend of mine was buried today, someone who I had a chance to know, to share a bit of life
with, and to let know that a small town world was much different than the one she had grown
up in. We shared some laughs, some tears, were there for each other when times were a
little tough, and listened when life's problems seemed insurmoutable. We understood each
other, loved each other as real friends do, and shared the small victories that make life so
much fun.

Her name was Laurie Bannon, and she moved here from Toronto in the early 90's. She loved
the idea of living in a small town, and was constantly amazed at our attitude as compared to
that of the people who lived in the city. She liked our casual outlook on life, our "it'll get done
when it get's done, no rush," philosophy, and the fact that she could be herself and not be
judged otherwise. She was a happy person, one who enjoyed the outdoors, and who loved
to be able to help others when possible. Full of energy, she was constantly on the go, always
had a project in the works, and had hopes and aspirations to build a better life. When life
seemed to rebel against her, she always found a way to get around it, to find opportunity
where none seemed to exist, and to make the best of a bad situation. I helped when I could,
when she would let me, giving her a job when money was tight, offering support when she
was down, and she always rebounded and would give you that big smile that said, "Everything's
cool, thanks for being there!"

She got a kick out of being able to cross-country ski down to the shop to work, and called her
mother after the first time she did this because she was so excited about it.

She loved to watch the sun rise over the pond downtown in the early morning hours, seeing the
first rays of a new day.

She liked raspberry tea.

A couple of years ago, she moved to Kitchener to start the next phase of her life, which
included a a man she could love and a beautiful daughter they would have together.
We stayed in touch, checking up on each other and sharing our news, and when he left
the two of them, she came back to town to be with the people she knew and loved.
We watched her and Julie grow together, and then it was time for them to move on once
more, and it was back to the city for work and a new life.

Time passed, and as it did, our chats and visits were less and less frequent. Every now
and then the phone would be picked up, or a visit would be paid, and we would pick up where
we had left off, and it always seemed that we had never been apart. It was a special friendship,
one that was always there, one that thrived despite a lack of constant communication. Julie
continued to grow, as all children do, giving her mother fits whenever possible, but always with
a smile and the constant amazement at life that all children possess.

We last talked about a year ago, just checking up on each other, making sure that life was
treating each other well. She had had a bout with cancer, but had beaten it, and was feeling
good, living life with the gusto she always seemed to possess. And then, two weeks ago, I
got word through a mutual friend that Laurie's cancer was back, and she was dying. There
was nothing they could do for her, and she had refused the chemotherapy that had
devestated her before, knowing that it would only delay the inevitable. She refused visitors
and phone calls, not wanting people to see her this way, wanting them to remember her as
she was.

She died Monday morning at 3:30 A.M.

I never got to say goodbye.

You will be missed Laurie, by all those whose lives you touched. You live on in Julie, with
her bright smile and happy nature, and we will always think of you.

You were my friend.

Rest now, sweet lady, and Godspeed to you...

2000-10-29T08:11:00.000-06:00

The Power Of Love...

Isn't the power of love an amazing thing? I'm talking about true love here, the kind that enfolds you,
affects you to your very core, the kind that literally changes your world when you yourself thought
that everything was already as good as it could possibly be. My life has changed because of it,
made oh so much better, more wonderful, more beautiful because of one lady...Michelle.
I can see you guys rolling your eyes, thinking "uh-oh, here we go again", but just let me roll with
this, okay? Before she came into my life, I thought that I had a pretty good handle on things,
that I knew what life was about, and I was content in that knowledge. Looking back, I realize
that my former life was like one of those little sparklers you buy on Victoria Day; you light it,
it sparks and fizzes for a little bit, and then it's reduced to a piece of smoking metal, dull and
lifeless. But now, life is like one of the Benson and Hedges Symphonies of Fire, with wondrous
exploding light, wild and enchanting music to back it up, and at the end of the show, your heart
pounds with excitement from witnessing this breathtaking spectacle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And the best
part is, this symphony never ends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's continuous, never-ending, and each moment is
more spectacular than the moment before!!!!!!! How can this be? you ask. We've all experienced
love before, and after a while the fire eventually burns down to embers, with a glow that's still
there, and an accompanying warmth, but it's nothing like the blaze at the beginning. Well, I'm
here to tell you that that's the difference between "love" and "true love". Yes, I'll agree, with a
regular love (if there is such a thing), the initial excitement does fade and a warm complaceny
takes its place, one where you are happy, though not ecstatic, and satisfied, though not really
contented. There always seems to be something missing, although you may not realize it, but
there seems to be a hole somewhere, and that which was so wonderful in the beginning seems
to have leaked out of it. That's where true love differs. Every day is new and beautiful, and you
can't seem to get enough out of life. The one that you love is always on your mind, and their
face is always before you, and the feeling that wells up in your heart and soul is one that can
only be compared to the beginning of life. It's a feeling of being re-born, and each day it grows
within you, making you aware of everything in life that is good. When you feel down, it is there
to hold you until you feel better. When you are lost, it is there to take you by the hand and
guide you out of the wilderness. And when you are happy, when you are totally contented with
your life and who you are, it is there for you, asking not for recognition, but letting you know
that it is yours unequivocally, and it is happy to do just that. And what is better than that?
There are too many things in our lives that come with strings attached, with someone saying
"what's in it for me". The beauty of true love is that there ARE no strings, that it is there
for you to share with that special someone, and when it IS well and truly shared, then you
are able to bask in the glow of life that you and your true love create around you. There is
no obstacle that you cannot overcome, no pain that you cannot get through, no feeling of
doubt that cannot be quelled, and all of it because of true love. Michelle makes my world.
Not just a better place, not just a place where I am happy, nor just a place where I know
peace and contentment, she literally MAKES my world. With our shared true love, all of
the feelings that I have known previously in my life have been eclipsed and overshadowed,
a blaze of glory that transcends all!!

She is my true love.

2000-10-25T15:09:00.000-05:00

The Beauty Of Her Smile...

When she walks into the room, she sees me and her face lights up. Her smile wreathes her face, and
once again I become lost in it. She has a smile that can chase the gloom of day away, change your
heartaches to joy, and make you feel like a child again, sweet and innocent. It's a smile that comes
from deep inside of her, from the very depths of her soul, and you know that all the love she has for
you is behind it. And it is for you, and only you...

I wish that people could know the beauty of her smile, to understand the person that is behind it, and
to truly understand how close they are to a person who can change their lives with just one glance. If
they knew, truly knew, the things that I know, their lives would be so much better. To know her is to
be given life and love, and to be loved by her is Heaven. Would that others could be so lucky!!!
Oh, sweet Michelle...

2000-10-23T16:11:00.000-05:00

Well, here we all are again, another day in this cyber-realm that is so rapidly bringing the world together;
new people, new faces, new friendships.
What is on my mind today, you are asking? It's this, and it's preceded by a quote:
"You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore."

How many people go through life thoroughly disenchanted with their lot in life? How many times
have these people felt cheated, felt that life hasn't been fair to them, and wish so desparately
to change things, make their life a better place, but lack the strength, fortitude and self-confidence
to do so? Too many, I feel, and that is a sad thing. Life has passed so many by, people whose
life-ending, war-torn battle cry has been "what if?" What if, indeed? What would our world be like
if the explorers from centuries past had been afraid to sail the ocean and discover what was out
there? What would our world of knowledge contain if all the old beliefs had not been questioned,
and those who were brave enough to question those beliefs had supressed that urge within them?
What would our personal worlds be like if we settled for life the way it is handed to us, just accepting
it for what it is and not wanting to change it for fear of leaving behind that which we know and is
familiar. Fear of the unknown has haunted humankind for untold eons, but we all have the courage
within us to explore these realms, to make our own personal discoveries and to realize what they
can do for our lives. We all have this courage, as I have said, but how many are willing to use it?
to wield it as the sword and shield that it can be to protect us when we need it. Life is a great
adventure, and we must have the self-confidence to break free from the ways of everday thinking
and dare to be ourselves in a world that expects conformity. Another quote; "To be yourself in
a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest thing." Dare to dream,
dare to believe in yourselves, dare to challenge the world and win. Michelle has. Tracey has.
Darren has. I have. Believe in yourself, and others will too.

I'd like to take a moment to welcome Darren to our little group of bloggerism!! A new adventure begins!
Check out the following sites, and dare to dream with us...LoveShackbaby, Flutterbymee and Cosmos

When that hurricane is building off the coast, and you're in the area where landfall is imminent,
don't just lay there, passed out in your hammock...dare to challenge, to show that you will not
be uprooted. Nature is an awesome, incredibly powerful entity, but what is stronger than belief
in oneself and the belief in true love?

2000-10-21T13:30:00.000-05:00

Beautiful Michelle
Shining eyes and sparkling smile
My eternal Love

Haikus are such a wonderful way to express one's feelings. Poetry is a form of communication
that has been around for thousands of years, and what better way to convey feeling so simply and
completely?

What is it that makes life so beautiful? Is it the feelings we have for others? the appreciation
we have for the spectacle of Nature's changing seasons? or is it something that can only be
felt and truly understood deep inside of each one of us? This is a question that I asked myself
as I was walking down the streets of my little town this morning, enjoying the sunrise and
watching as it transformed the leaves on the trees from dark, shapeless forms to blazing shards
of glorious light. The sky went from a tainted gray to an azure blue, and with the change of
colours came the awakening of life, both within and without. And as I gazed at all of this, it
reminded me of something that I wanted to share with all of you...

We all know people in our lives who seem to be different, who seem to carry that extra
special something within them that can affect all of us. Michelle and Tracey are like that,
and I'd like to tell you about how they've made me a much better person for knowing them.

In our lives, we're not always dealt the hands that we'd like to have. We react in different
ways to the curves thrown at us, and we'd all like to think that we will handle it as best we
can, to take it and run with it and ultimately make something good out of what at first seems
to be a slight against us. And no matter what, we try to keep in mind that we have faith in
ourselves and our beliefs, and that that will make us stronger. At times like this, when I have
squalls out on the Gulfstream, I think of Michelle and Tracey, and how they have made me
more of a better person than I ever thought I could be. I think of the inner strength they possess,
of the obstacles that they've had to overcome, and how they use their love and friendship for
each other to get through whatever has been thrown in their path. To me, they are truly forces
of nature, and when they are together they affect everyone around them, even though they may
not realize it. I've watched them sitting in my shop, carrying on a conversation, laughing and
smiling at what is being said, and I see the people around them begin to change. They'll start
off being in their own little worlds, keeping to themselves, occupied with their own thoughts,
and then the magic starts to work and you can see a wondrous transformation take place. There
is suddenly life in their eyes and a smile upon their faces, and for the most part they have no idea
of why that is. They don't realize that they are in the presence of true beauty and happiness, that
there are two ladies sitting close to them who have reached out to them on a subconscious level
and helped them to remember all the good things in life and what living is all about. The frowns
disappear, eyes light up with memories of good things, and when they leave, their perception has
been changed. It will linger for a time, letting them appreciate the world around them and how
good it can be, but it won't last forever. That's something that changes, however, when you
actually have the good fortune to meet and get to know these two ladies. Their smiles are
ever-present, their joy cannot be contained, and they make you feel like you've never felt before.
To know them is to know life and love, and I have been fortunate to realize both through them.
Tracey can make me laugh, putting a smile on my face even when the going is at its toughest.
She understands the subtle intricacies of life, and how to deal with all of them. Michelle, my
love and my life, lights me from within, letting me experience life and love as it is meant to be.
She makes me laugh and smile, and she makes me live. Feelings once thought to be long
dead have reawakened, and once again, my world is beautiful. These two ladies are like
hurricanes, except instead of wreaking havoc and destruction, they will sweep you up and
carry you away with the sheer power of their personalities. They can take you places that
you've only dreamed of, and I just wish that I could bottle a little bit of their essence and
share it with those I know who could use that pure joy and happiness so desparately. To
have that little bit of sunshine in your life is to change it for the better.

They are like two shooting stars, streaking across the night sky in a blaze of glory so
intense that the world can only stare in wonder and awe, and to have them in my life is
to be able to share my happiness with others that much more readily. Tracey is a
true friend, of which we all have so few of in this life, and Michelle is not only a true
friend but also the love that I have searched for all my life. I hope they will always be
there, not just for me but for all who need the inspiration they can inspire.

They are my friends, and I love them dearly.

2000-10-20T12:55:00.000-05:00

In my life, I have pondered many questions, but I have found that there are really only four
of them that apply to everyone. They are...

What is sacred?

Of what is the spirit made?

What is worth living for?

What is worth dying for?

The answer to all four questions, of course, is LOVE. So many search for it and never find it,
a lifelong pursuit that can leave one feeling empty and completely alone. And some, like myself,
are fortunate enough to find the one whom will fulfill their destiny and let them live and experience
life the way that it is meant to be. My answer is Michelle. She is my life, my love, my everything.
She is my island in the midst of a storm-tossed sea, she is the life-giving water in the middle of
a desert, she is the first buds of spring after the cruel embrace of winter. All is new and wonderful
with her, and for that I am eternally thankful. She is my Angel.

2000-10-19T13:57:00.000-05:00

Hi, and welcome to this first posting in a new era in my life! This will be my site to share my news
and views, and to let you folks see into a world that may cause you to smile, laugh, cry or empathize
with. This is new for me, going public with thoughts and feelings, because I'm usually a very private
person, and, being a rather public figure, I think that the people who know me would be astounded at
what I have to say. Those who see me publicly all seem to think they know who the "real" me is,
but those who know me outside of that world know better; they know that beneath this seemingly
calm exterior are thoughts and insights that resemble foam on a storm-tossed sea prior to a
hurricane. Who will I be when I'm with you? Will I be that public figure that everyone seems to
like? the one who always listens to a problem or is there with a quick joke or a smile to brighten a
day? Or will I be that person who's private life is one that is hidden from all but the most special
and beloved, those people who have made my life such a special place (right, Chicklets?), a place
of magic and wonder at all the beauty this world has to hold. On this site you'll see both sides of
that person; my observations, views, musings, and you'll meet some very special people who have
made my world the place that is. I guess that that is a good little introduction, something that will
give you an idea of what can and will be happening here.

I'd like to take a moment here and thank two very special ladies, Michelle and Tracey, for all the
love and caring that they've shown me these past few months. People like these two ladies come
along very infrequently in life, and I count myself so lucky to know and love them. They've opened
up a new world to me, and it's one that I wish everyone could experience, but so few ever will...
Along with the Brother, they are my greatest friends, and always will be. I cherish and treasure
each moment spent with them. And Pook, you know that my love for you is undying and
unending, one that will continue Forever and Beyond Eternity....:)

So ends my first post, but there will be many more to follow. Welcome to my world, and all
of those who inhabit it. Enjoy!